I have problems sleeping, so I usually wake up very early. I have nightmares every night and I tend to wake up with my heart beating out of my chest.
Today was no exception. After I got up and centered myself, I remembered I had Therapy at 7am, so I quickly grabbed my coffee and jumped into my car.
Btw, I have limited myself to one cup a day to try and cut down on my anxiety.
I am not. Fan of new things, especially new drs. or drs. offices. Today I had both.
They are currently moving to a new building, so in the meantime they are sharing offices.
I always feel awkward with receptionists I don’t know, so I don’t talk much. Also I hate getting touched, so the blood pressure part sucks, but they know my issue, so they do their best to ha e no contact.
Like I said before, I have a new Dr. She’s nice, but I feel like she rushes me through the process. My old Dr. would take her time, and give me the time I needed to express myself.
I have daily panic attacks and we are trying to find a med that can help address that issue. I am already on meds for my ADHD, PTSD, OCD and anxiety. This helps but it doesn’t help with the big issues.
I know it sounds like I am a mess, but I am doing so much better then before. I actually can socialize even though I don’t always like it. Also I haven’t had any suicidal thoughts lately.
So I mumbled my way through the process and didn’t feel as good as I usually do. That never lasts long anyway. I always feel drained and down about an hour later.
All part of the process.
I didn’t even feel like writing today, but I need to. This has been great therapy for me. I can definitely feel a difference. This blog gives me a purpose to write and share my story.
I am starting to feel better, appreciate all the support, change takes time, and one day I am going to be able to make it through life without any meds, but for now I take it one day at a time.
Have a great day.