Sometimes I take small vacations from reality. I find a corner of the room and draw, meditate, or read. Sometimes I get tunnel vision (especially when drawing). This enables me to disconnect from the parts of my life that are overwhelming.
It’s needed to decompress from the stress and overall chaos that life sometimes dumps on us.
I tend to obsess over the negative aspects of life and loose site of the important stuff. I get stuck on the things I’ve done wrong, or decisions I am not happy with.
Usually I can find a lesson in that failure, or I realize it wasn’t really that big of a deal. Other times things get stuck in my head, like a record skipping on an infinite loop.
Lately I’ve been so busy that I haven’t taken the time to zone out and leave reality. I’ve had a lot of things on my mind. Life lays heavy on my shoulders (as it does to most of us). I just have some decisions to make.
I am at a crossroads with my writing. I’ve been writing for half my life, but I’ve never tried to publish anything. I love to write but I am terrified to put myself out there.
I know I write this blog, so obviously I am not as scared of putting myself out there as I used to.
There’s a huge difference between sharing my thoughts and poems on here and trying to be a professional writer. I would love to write articles or have my poems published. The thing is the thought both excites and scares the shit out of me.
I am working on an E-book, but somedays I feel like quitting. I just can’t fail at being a writer. It would crush me, it’s the only thing I’ve ever really wanted to be. So I sabotage myself and avoid opportunities. If I don’t put myself I can’t fail, but obviously I can’t succeed either.
It’s a conundrum.
I’ve come to the decision to say. “fuck it.”. If I fail, I fail, but I refuse to live my entire life regretting the fact that I didn’t chase my dreams when I had the chance.
I think it’s easy to procrastinate, it’s too easy for me. I am sure a lot of you have similar issues. So I am working on it. I thank all of you for following along and supporting me on here.
I wouldn’t have come as far as I have already without all of you.
The last thing I have to say is, life can be a bitch, but don’t let anything stop you from following your dream. Now that I sound like a cheesy after school special, I’ll wrap this post up.
As always have great one.